I know the ratio of people having the problem is larger than people anticipate, but, how many are actually sharing their details? And those who do, how do you tell the person? I am nervous about telling people I may be interested in, even though I know I didn't cause this problem, I had monogamous sex with a man I thought I knew. Thank you.
In reply to the first response:
I don't plan on not telling people, that's the point of my question. If I didn't care I certainly wouldn't ask; but I know that many people don't, not only because they choose not to tell people out of fear or selfishness, but because they simply don't know they have it.
I'd like to add before anyone judges, if you have sex regularly, like most folks do, whether you're monogamous or not, GET TESTED for STD's regularly! You never know.. sometimes symptoms don't show! We're all different.. and...You can never be too safe. It's not only for your safety, but also for the safety of your current/future partners. If you don't have health insurance, there are many clinics that offer assistance.
Also, HSV 2 is dangerous for women who plan on having a baby naturally. Educate yourself!
philly1330
Like this: "I have HSV type 2".
Sorry to sound sarcastic, but in that situation, it's best not to mince words or beat around the bush. Just flat out tell them, and make sure you have alot of information to answer the inevitable flurry of questions with.
Just one more thing: if you don't tell them, and they contract it, you can be charged with criminal negligence.
Shannon C
it's hard to tell someone especially when it's someone you like etc. its best to be honest. i wouldn't bring it up to just anyone, but someone that you potentially are going to have sex with. i would explain that you haven't had any problems but carry the virus and you're being honest as a precaution as to not infect someone else as you were. if the person is kind and really into you then they will understand. trust me.
Paul R
No matter how you slice it, it is tough. There are on-line dating, friendship and support groups for people with HSV 1 or 2. Here is the basics... Make sure you know the facts, refer the person to the Internet to learn about it themselves. Understand it is not going to be easy breaking the news as it places you in a pretty vulnerable position. Go for a walk, to a park, some place quite and sit the person down and explain your feelings and that you want a lifelong relationship. Explain what happened and how you contracted HSV 2. If you have already been intimate with this person, be prepared to answer the big question of: "Why didn't you tell me before?". Good luck and if you need support or want to hear from others with HSV 2, visit club462 and join one of their support rooms.
~Quixotic~
My friend dated a guy who didn't tell her until late in the relationship. She FLIPPED out on him. She later told me that she loved him, but since he waited so late to tell her, she felt betrayed. They had been together a couple years. So be sure you don't wait that long. I know that's got to be a tough decision. Also, BELIEVE IT OR NOT, its not a big deal to some people. Just be truthful, and tell them before you have sex. Its not like your gonna say, you were hooking downtown and bam woke up one day to HSV 2. You were cheated on and didn't get to make a choice, THAT SUX, but if you just be honest and say it like it is, if its the right person, it wont matter to them. I have you in my prayers. Good luck.
Danielle J
Me and my husband have been together for 5 years and I told him that I had HSV-2 before we where ever intimate it's really no way to tell how some one is going to react and thats why it's so scary...just be up front and honest...you really have no choice but to deal with what ever reaction that person has....just don't have sex before you tell him.....It's people have done that and have actually gotten killed.....good luck
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